Over the last few generations, the
spirit embodied in the American family has been severely tested;
and frankly it is faltering and with it the nation also falters. As
record numbers of families fall apart or fail to form in the first
place-a trend that has continued at an alarming rate since the
1960s-we have witnessed an epidemic of broken homes and broken
families, greater sexual promiscuity among younger teenagers, a
high number of out-of-wedlock births, a failure to reduce
abortions, and more single and divorced mothers falling into
poverty. Throughout the social science literature, we find an
ever-present correlation between a breakdown in the family and
increases in child poverty, juvenile delinquency, child abuse, poor
academic performance, addictions, and health problems.
Not all Americans suffer from what I call this "The Culture of
Rejection and Alienation." In fact, the data shows that, overall,
the always-married intact family always provides children with more
wealth, greater happiness, better health and educational
opportunities, and more stability than any other arrangement. And
the spiritual benefits loom large as well: Families that worship
together tend to stay together and pass on to future generations
more benefits and the bedrock moral principles upon which America's
democratic experience is founded.
The great experiment in freedom that is the United States of
America rests on a vibrant culture grounded in the family where
children have been accepted, loved, and cherished by both
biological parents. They are more likely to develop the virtues on
which a democracy is dependent. But the Culture of Rejection and
Alienation undermines this family foundation. Though there are some
encouraging signs that a reversal may have begun, the damage-as you
will see in the following discussion of the social science data-has
been vast, especially among the poor.
Turning around this Culture of Rejection will require more than
the heavy hand of government, for too often it has been
government's hand that contributed most to the crisis. The
instruments and agents of the state have no capacity to evoke
between parents the love, loyalty, and commitment among needed for
a strong marriage. Government actions can, however, encourage or
discourage, support or block the other important social
institutions that cooperate with the family-most notably the
churches and faith-based schools, institutions well-equipped to
offer direct and indirect help to parents and families. Leaders at
all levels of government and within every community need to give
these institutions greater support and encouragement to do the job
only they can do well. Too often, they bar them at the door.
THE NATIONAL TRAGEDY REFLECTED IN THE "RATIO OF REJECTION"
The natural family, in which a mother and father raise the
children they have conceived, is best embodied in the intact
married family, or the traditional family. This family is founded
on love, loyalty and commitment. All other family structures
(except the widowed-parent family) are households that are based on
some form of personal rejection or at least on ambivalence toward
commitment. For instance, in the always single-parent family, one
parent rejects marrying the other and rejects giving the child a
married family in which to grow. The divorced single-parent family
occurs only after a profound rejection has occurred between the
parents. The rejection of a prior spouse is the usual condition
upon which most (though not all) stepfamilies today are built.
Finally, in cohabiting single-parent households, the parent has
rejected a child's other natural parent, and both cohabiting adults
are ambivalent about a long-term relationship.
The deliberate acts of rejection or
ambivalence at the root of these family structures have deep
consequences for everyone involved. Most adults can recall the
intense pain they felt as a teenager when their first romance broke
up. That type of severed relationship is rarely debilitating over
the long term. Rejection of the type that fractures families is
much more damaging when one is married or a single parent, because
the person who did the rejecting was a partner who had already
forever altered one's life most deeply. Such damage is deep and
lasting on the rejected adult and on the child. Though not all
forms of family rejection are deliberately brutal, they nonetheless
are serious. Even if divorcing parents work to minimize the pain,
an open wound from the absence of a spouse or parent remains. And
in the best of cases, the breakup between parents rarely can be
neutral.

To understand why I call this the Culture of Rejection and
Alienation in America, let's look at Chart 1,
which shows the stunning increase in the numbers of children
entering broken families after 1950. Children enter a broken home
in two ways-by out-of-wedlock births or by their parents' divorce.
To understand the extent of this increasing ratio of rejection,
consider:
- In 1950, for every 100
children born, 12 entered a broken family-four born out of wedlock
and eight from their parents' divorce.
- By the mid-1990s, 58 out of
every 100 children born in the United States entered a broken
home.
This drastic change gives us a clear picture
of the turmoil America's children are experiencing. However, the
chart also tells a startling story about what has been going on
between men and women in American society. The vast majority (60
percent) of American men and women who have brought children into
the world cannot stand each other well enough to raise their
children to adulthood. Such a massive level of alienation and
rejection between fathers and mothers has massive consequences for
society through the consequences on the children invovled (6 out of
every 10 children).
My deepest concern is that a
stable and peaceful nation cannot last on this diet of alienation
and rejection; and, like a cancer, this Culture of Rejection will
at some time undo the glue that binds America together.
The Impact of
Abortion
The cancer in
Chart 1 looks even worse when we add the very high numbers of
children who are aborted each year by their mothers. This number
has begun to decline recently, but the statistics are still
shocking: One third out of every 100 children conceived each year
will be killed in their mother's womb, one-third will be born out
of wedlock, and of those born to married parents one-half will see
their parents divorce before they reach the age of 18. The Culture
of Rejection dominates American family life. (See Chart 2.)
America is increasingly a scary place to be born.

Abortion is one of the most contentious issues in
the United States today, but what is constantly avoided in the
abortion debate is the relationship between abortion and sexual
intercourse outside of marriage. As Chart 3
shows, the overwhelming number of abortions-82 percent-occur to
women who are not married. Only 18 percent of abortions are
attributed to women who are married. Since abortion became a
protected "right," this proportion has generally not changed,
according to national sample data collected by the Alan Guttmacher
Institute. The inescapable conclusion is that abortion acts as the
ultimate "protector" of sexual relations outside of
marriage.

To reduce abortions the importance of teaching abstinence before
marriage becomes clear. And the data on teenage abortion rates bear
this out: Teenage abortions are dropping, as more teenagers are
being taught abstinence in more and more schools and as teenage
chastity is rising, all reflected in recent federal surveys.
Out-of-Wedlock
Birth
Chart 4
contains bad news and good news. The bad news: Out-of-wedlock
births have risen over this half century from 4 percent to 33
percent. The good news: This proportion has remained steady at 33
percent for the last few years.
The effects of out-of-wedlock birth include:1
- Increased
welfare dependency; some 92 percent of children on welfare
today are from broken families;2
- Lowered health
expectations for newborns and risk of early infant death;
- Retarded
cognitive, especially verbal, development;
- Lowered
educational achievement;
- Lowered job
attainment;
- Increased
behavior problems;
- Lowered impulse
control, especially of sexual desire and anger;
- Warped
social development;
- Increased crime
in the local community; and
- Increased risk of being physically or sexually abused.3

Divorce
In the late 1970s, almost 1.2 million children each year suffered
the trauma of seeing their parents divorce. Since then, the number
has dropped to just over 1 million children affected each year.
(See Chart 5.)

This
drop may at first appear somewhat encouraging, but it is also
somewhat misleading because of the increase in the numbers of
parents cohabiting. Cohabitation has increased since the mid-1970s,
and a certain proportion of children of cohabiting adults have seen
their biological parents split. (Splitting up, in fact, is more
frequent among cohabiting couples than divorce is among married
couples). At present, there are more than 1.1 million children who
suffer their parents breaking up forever, leaving them suspended as
a link in a difficult relationship of rejection between their
parents. The combination of high rates of divorce and cohabiting
parents has serious consequences for children and
society.
The effects of divorce on children
are pervasive:4
- In the areas of government and citizenship, divorce is followed
by increases in the rates of juvenile crime, abuse and neglect, and
addiction.
- In education, divorce is
followed by diminished learning capacities and less high school and
college degree attainment. Children from divorced homes, for
example, perform more poorly in reading, spelling, and math, and
repeat a grade more frequently than do children from two-parent
intact families.
- In the marketplace, divorce precedes reductions in household
income and the lifetime accumulation of wealth by family members.
For families that were not poor before a divorce, income can drop
by as much as 40 percent. Children raised in intact families have
higher earnings as adults than do children from other family
structures.
- In the realm of spiritual development, divorce is followed by a
drop in both worship and recourse to prayer.
- Divorce weakens the health of children and shortens their life
spans. It increases the rates of behavioral, emotional, and
psychiatric problems, including suicide. (Chart 6 gives
some idea of the magnitudes of some of these deficits.)
- Divorce can permanently weaken
the child's relationship with his or her parents and peers. It
often leads to destructive ways of handling conflict, a diminished
competency in relationships, the early loss of virginity, and a
diminished sense of masculinity or femininity. It leads to more
acceptance of and frequency of cohabitation, higher expectations of
divorce and rates of divorce as an adult, and less desire to have
children.

These effects on the future family life of the children are
disturbing because they compound the downward spiral of social
decay in many communities and cities. Though any one particular
child may overcome these weaknesses-because of the great love and
dedication of one parent or stepparent, or thanks to the special
help of a teacher or the friendship of someone in the community-as
a group the children of divorce bear the burden of these weakening
effects. The layering of one generation of broken family life on
top of another is compounding these weaknesses and eating away at
the "social capital" of the United States.
Cohabitation
Cohabitation rates have been growing steadily for the last 20
years. Adults who cohabit and then marry are twice as likely to
divorce as those who marry without cohabiting first. And those who
cohabit with one person but marry someone else divorce at double
that rate again-that is they have four times the risk of divorce as
those who do not cohabit before marriage. (See Chart 7.)

Though the likelihood of cohabitation after
the divorce of one's parents is understandable, because of the
distrust of the strength of the marriage vows (daughters of
divorced parents almost always cohabit before marriage),
cohabitation is still a "bad bet." "Trial marriages" do not
strengthen a later marriage; statistically speaking, they weaken
it.
WHAT HOME IS LIKE FOR AMERICAN CHILDREN
In light of all of this fracturing of families, what type of
family structure do most American children have? Chart 8 shows
the family structure of all American children, from newborns to
18-year-olds:

- 47 percent live with parents
in their first marriage-the intact family;
- 19 percent live in
stepfamilies (the vast majority of these the result of a
divorce);
- 6 percent live with adults who
cohabit;
- 6 percent live with
always-single parents (who bore the child out of wedlock and did
not marry later);
- 16 percent live with divorced
or separated parents; and
- 6 percent live with widowed
parents.
The picture changes when we
look at our major ethnic groups: 75 percent of Asian American
children, 50 percent of white and Hispanic children, and 27 percent
of African-American children live with their married natural
parents.
Looking at what happens to American children by the time they
reach the end of childhood, we find that among those aged 14 to 18,
only 42 percent of children live with their mother and father in an
intact married family. Based on this figure, we can say that only
about four in 10 children born in the United States will be living
in the natural intact family of mother, father, and siblings by the
time they reach age 18.
Family Structure and Income
As Chart 9
shows, there are significant differences in average annual incomes
for different family structures:
- The intact married family has
the highest average yearly income of $48,000;
- The average stepfamily makes
an average yearly income of $45,900;
- The cohabiting family,
$25,000;
- The separated or divorced
single-parent family, $18,500; and
- The family of an always-single parent, $15,000.5

The average intact family is 3.2 times
more successful in the marketplace than the always single parent
family.
Parents in different family structures work different numbers of
hours on average per year, which of course explains part of the
difference in the amounts they earn. Clearly, two parents in a
family can work more hours than can a single parent, but even in
the two-parent family, a difference in income is found based on
family structure (see Chart 10; this
income does not include income transfers, which changes the picture
of the total income for the poor significantly):
- The intact married family
works an average of 3,336 hours per year;
- The stepfamily works an
average of 3,223 hours per year; and
- The cohabiting family works an
average of 2,966 hours per year;

Among single-parent family structures, the hours are even
lower:
- The divorced/separated
single-parent family works an average of 1,528 hours per
year;
- Families with single parents
or never-married parents work an average of 1,056 hours per year;
and
- The widowed-parent family
works an average of 750 hours per year.
Divorce and
Poverty
Divorce is the primary reason women and children move below the
poverty line. Chart
11shows information from one study that looked at the average
drop in household income in 1993 after the divorce of parents with
children-from $43,000 before the divorce to $25,300 after. That
drop is larger than what the national economy experienced during
the Great Depression (a 30.5 percent drop).

Divorced mothers do not tend to stay in poverty as
long as always-single mothers do. The average stay of divorced
mothers on welfare is three to four years, during which time they
are able to work their way out of poverty. The always-single mother
is less likely and takes longer to escape the trap.
Family Structure and Wealth
One study from 1994 demonstrates the differences in the
median wealth of families (based on home ownership, stocks, and
savings) by family structure.6
This wealth was measured when
adults were in their 50s, after they had put in most of their time
in the workforce but before they retired and began dipping into
their savings. For most families, their wealth is primarily tied up
in their houses. On this factor, the median wealth of married
couples is almost four times greater than that of single divorced
parents (see Chart
12):
- Median wealth of married
couples is $132,000;
- Median wealth of widowed
parents: $42,275;
- Median wealth of single,
never-married parents: $35,000;
- Median wealth of single
divorced parents: $33,670.

Thus, it should come as no
surprise that the earnings of the vast majority of single-parent
families fall on the lower end of the income spectrum: 75 percent
of children in the bottom quintile of income live in single-parent
families,
and an overwhelming number
of children in poverty live in single-parent homes. Notice in Chart 13
that the overwhelming majority of children in the upper quintiles
of income have two-parent families.

HOW FAMILY BREAKDOWN AFFECTS CHILDREN
Looking at the information in
the next few charts which show the serious effects associated with
the breakdown of the family will enable us to see where the
problems are the greatest.
Poverty
occurs the least often in intact and stepparent families (10
percent). Importantly, although the poverty rate for
African-American families is 30 percent, among African-American
married families with children, it is only 3 percent.7 (See Chart 14 and
Chart
15.)


Crime is somewhat more
difficult to assess, since the federal government does not track
information on family structure in its statistics. Chart 16 shows
data from Wisconsin, the only state that studied juvenile
incarceration rates by family background. Using this data, analysts
at The Heritage Foundation found that:
- Juvenile delinquency is lowest
in the two-parent family (both intact and step- families);
but
- It is five times more
prevalent among children with married but separated parents;
- Among children with divorced
parents, juvenile delinquency is 12 times higher; and
- Among children of always
single parents, it is 22 times higher.
There are clear indications from a
review of academic studies that crime rates for African-Americans
and white Americans are not very different if we control for the
presence of marriage. Among blacks and whites who come from broken
families, the rate is similar and very high; for blacks and whites
from intact married families, the rate is similar but very low.
(See Chart
16.)

Clearly, family structure has a huge
impact on juvenile crime, and it is the single biggest determining
factor of whether a child slips into delinquent behavior.8
Child
Abuse
The federal government also does not track family structure in
considering the incidences of serious child abuse. However, data
from the United Kingdom-which on many social issues compare closely
with the United States-show that:
- Serious child abuse is lowest
in the always-married (intact) family.
- It is six times higher in the
stepfamily than in the intact family.
- It is 14 times higher in
families with single mothers (divorced and always-single mothers
combined).
- It is 20 times higher in
families with single fathers (predominantly divorced
fathers).
- It is 20 times higher in
families with cohabiting biological parents.
- The most dangerous environment for a child is the home where
the mother cohabits with a boyfriend; serious child abuse is 33
times higher in these homes.9
The same holds true for fatal child abuse
rates, but the differences in rates are more pronounced. Most
fatalities occur in homes where the mother cohabits with a
boyfriend-the rate is 73 times higher than in intact families. This
cohabiting boyfriend configuration is found in most of the gruesome
cases of child abuse that make the headlines today. The intact
marriage of a natural mother and natural father is the greatest
safeguard againstchild abuse. (See Chart 17 and
Chart
18.)

Serious child abuse has increased
steadily over the last few decades in the United States. (See Chart 19.)
Regrettably, the seriously abused or neglected child is most likely
to become the psychopath who commits the most heinous crimes or the
dangerous thug preying on residents of particular neighborhoods at
night. As the rates of abuse go up, the numbers of violent
criminals do as well.

Education and School
Performance
Analysts at The
Heritage Foundation looked at data from the National Longitudinal
Survey of Adolescent Health, the federal government's largest
research project looking into how teenagers fare on a host of
issues. The findings on the average overall grade point average
(GPA) of American teenagers in math, English, social studies, and
science in 1995, out of a maximum possible score of 4.0, are shown
by family structure in Chart 20.
These GPAs are 2.98 for teenagers who have intact married parents;
for those who live with cohabiting adults, 2.79; with stepparents,
2.71; with always-single parents, 2.68; and with divorced single
parents, 2.64.

A slightly different picture of how teenagers from different
family structures behave in school emerges when we look at children
who are expelled from school. Teenagers with different family
backgrounds are expelled at different rates (see Chart
21):
- Of teenagers who live with
their still-married mothers and fathers, 2 percent are
expelled;
- Of those living with parents
who cohabit, 7 percent;
- Of those living with
stepparents, 7 percent;
- Of those living with divorced
single parents, 7 percent; and
- Of those living with an
always-single parent, 9 percent.

These differences in school performance and behaviors carry over
into adulthood in how these children handle positions of
responsibility in the marketplace and how much they earn.
HOW FAITH AND FAMILY AFFECT SEXUAL ACTIVITY
There is a fundamental relationship between faith, family, and the
sexual act. It took me a long time to see it.
The whole purpose of creation and of the
raising up of the people of Israel from Abraham down through Moses
and the prophets, and (for Christians) of the Incarnation, Calvary,
the Resurrection, and the founding of the Church is to reach the
ultimate goal: God wants a very large family to live with Him in
heaven forever. And the way He brings every member of this huge
family into existence is through the sexual act. It is central to
His whole order. And its centrality is recognized and cultivated in
the good society. No other act in the natural order has the power
to do anything like it: to bring a new being into existence
forever. The wealth of the richest person, the insights of the most
brilliant individual ever, the works of the greatest artist
measures less than does just one member of that family. The sexual
act is more powerful than atomic energy-for good or ill. Until
recently, Western civilization has sanctioned the sexual act only
within the institution of marriage, and the norms, rewards,
sanctions, and taboos of society had the sole purpose of
shepherding young adults toward marriage. The sexual revolution,
which started a century or more ago, overturned these norms,
sanctions, and taboos. Even federal government policies have become
part of the new wave of revolutionary activity denying and
undermining those cultural patterns that shepherd sexual
intercourse towards marriage.
It is worthwhile to consider how the relationship between family
and religious worship affects the sexual activity of teenagers and
young adults. This relationship can be found in nationally
representative data compiled in federally sponsored surveys and
international studies.
Declining Rates of
Fertility
One of the consequences of the sexual revolution has been a massive
decline in the fertility rate of all developed countries. It is
continually dropping, always declining wherever population control
policies have taken hold. To put it bluntly, developed nations are
not replacing themselves. Europe's low fertility rate means for all
intents and purposes it is dying out; its peoples are gradually
disappearing; Spain and Italy-with fertility rates that are close
to half the replacement rate (one child families) -will soon be
nations comprised of children who have no brothers or sisters,
aunts or uncles, or cousins. Families will be vertical between
generations, with no horizontal dimension, no extended family
members in each generation.
Europe's growing demographic vacuum is pulling in a vast
migration of people from Africa and Asia, reminiscent of the
movements of Vandals, Huns, Goths, and Visigoths in the 3rd through
6th centuries. Yet, as the latest U.N. reports indicate, even this
migration is not sufficient to sustain Europe's future economic
needs.10 The situation illustrates on a
grand scale Sigmund Freud's insights, in the latter half of his
professional life, on the effects of sex gone awry: thanatos, the
death wish.
In the United States, the
declining fertility rate of the non-immigrant population (much the
same as France and Germany) is masked by the higher fertility rate
of immigrants, which keeps our population at replacement
levels.
Even as it is well worth noting that a part of the declining
birth rate is the success of abstinence education among teenagers,
as Chart 22
illustrates, the rate of out-of-wedlock births is still highest
among women in their twenties. ( For the past five years, teens in
the 15-17 and 18-19 age groups have experienced a continual decline
in the number out-of-wedlock births. Among all teenagers, there has
been an increase in the rates of virginity, a decrease in
out-of-wedlock births, and a decrease in abortion).
Age of First
Intercourse.
The earlier a girl has her first sexual encounter, the more
sexual partners she is likely to have, the more susceptible she is
to contract a sexually transmitted disease, and the more likely she
is to become a single mother. (See Chart 23.)
The numbers of American girls having intercourse for the first time
by age 15 rose sharply between 1975 and 1988; the rate, which began
to drop in 1995, is still startlingly high-over 20
percent.
- In 1970, 4.6 percent of
American girls had lost their virginity by age 15;
- By 1975, the number had
increased to 9.8 percent;
- By 1980, 16.7 percent of girls
had their first intercourse by age 15;
- By 1988, the number peaked at
just over 25 percent; and
- By 1995, the number had
dropped slightly to just over 22 percent.

Influence of Peers and Worship.
Peers have quite an impact
on teenage virginity. Chart 24
shows data on this subject compiled by a team of Midwestern
researchers who studied 16-year-old children in their region.11 I think this is one of the most
dramatic charts available in the social sciences today. On one end
of the spectrum are teenagers who do not worship at all and whose
friends are sexually active: 96 percent of such teenagers are
likely to be sexually active. On the other end of the spectrum are
teenagers who worship weekly and whose friends are not sexually
active: 97 percent of these teenagers are likely to be virgins.
Clearly, friends and worship are powerful influences on sexual
experiences.

Relationship with the Father.
The effect of peer
influences can be altered quite a bit by how close a teenager feels
to her parents, especially her father. As Chart 25
shows, a girl who has a close relationship with her father is more
likely to maintain her virginity for a longer period of time. If
she believes he cares about her, she is likely to remain a virgin
far longer than one who believes her father does not care about
her. With the absence of fathers in the home so prevalent today,
the implications of this fact for society are enormous.

Parents
Who Worship.
Whether a teenager's
parents worship matters. When neither parent worships, the rate of
virginity of children is small. When a mother worships but the
father does not, the rate is higher. When fathers worship but the
mother does not, the rate of virginity is somewhat higher still.
When both mother and father worship, children show the greatest
capacity to maintain their virginity.

Effects
of Worship on Young Adult Men.
As Chart 26
shows, findings from the National Longitudinal Survey of Youth, a
federal national long-term study, indicate that religious worship
by men in their twenties has quite an impact on their capacity to
sustain their own virginity.
The Most Sexually
Content Adults.
These findings fit very well with the findings of the most
comprehensive survey on sexuality in America presented in The
Social Organization of Sexuality:12 Those who have
the most enjoyable sexual relations as adults are married adults
who worship God every week and have had only one sexual
partner-their spouse.. This is a very different profile from the
one put forth by the purveyors of the sexual revolution over the
past three decades.
Worship and Income
Data
from the same National Longitudinal Survey of Youth demonstrates
the relationship between church attendance and family structure in
young adult men and the level of income in their early to
mid-thirties. As Chart 27
shows, young adult men in the lowest income group came from broken
families that never worshipped. The highest income group consisted
of young men who were raised in intact families that worshipped
weekly.

This finding fits with research conducted in the 1980s by
Harvard University labor economist Richard Freeman. He found that
children who make it out of inner-city poverty as adults (the vast
majority from single-parent families) overwhelmingly grew up in a
family that worshipped weekly. Of all the background factors that
helped individuals to escape poverty (and there are other
influences), Freeman found that the most powerful was weekly
religious worship. Yet America's largest church denominations fail
to advocate social policies based on this finding. It would be
valuable if church leaders spoke of this fact, especially when they
are trying to help the poor.
THE CASE FOR STRENGTHENING MARRIAGE AND WORSHIP
The data clearly show that growing up in a traditional married
family most often results in better health, longevity, happiness,
higher levels of educational attainment, stronger work ethics, and
more income and lifetime wealth, and also to much lower levels of
crime, drug addiction, out-of-wedlock births, abortion, divorce,
school dropouts, joblessness, poverty, illness, suicide, and
depression.
The same effects can be found
when we look at the frequency with which families worship God for
building a person's strengths and weaknesses, improving health,
attaining higher incomes, escaping poverty, being happier in
marriage, fewer out-of-wedlock births, less divorce, and lower
rates of drug and alcohol addiction. Worship also increases the
likelihood of a faster recovery from separations, addictions, and
crime.
Sociologically, it is interesting to note
that fostering a relationship with God will translate into an
increased inner strength which is evident in external behaviors. In
the jargon of social scientists, the data support the view that the
worship of God, in general, is a source of personal strength and
interpersonal capacity and a facilitator of social cohesion or, as
economists like to call it, social capital. When intact marriage
and regular religious worship are combined, social capital is
increased and benefits for children, adults, and the nation are
multiplied.
Given this association, we can logically (and sociologically)
assert that intact marriage and regular religious worship are two
of the most powerful and fundamental sources of social capital, and
when they are combined they help children have fulfilling
relationships in adulthood and achieve a higher standard of living
and greater health and happiness. Though these factors are "free,"
they are the most valuable to American society.
CONCLUSION
The challenge for America in
this new century is not to improve the economy, but to strengthen
the family and faith in God. One simple way to summarize the
insights gleaned from the social science research of the last
century is to say that
- children thrive within loving
family life,
- family life thrives when it is
built on intact marriages,
- and that intact marriages thrive when there is regular worship
of God.
Despite the ever-growing body of
evidence supporting this assertion, the rejection of fathers and
mothers of each other and their children continues at unprecedented
levels. By age 18, only four out of every 10 children remain in an
intact family-that is, live in a family where their mother and
father remain committed to each other and to their children.
- One-third of children are
rejected before birth in abortion;
- One-third are born to an
unmarried mother without a father who is committed to taking care
of them.
- One-half of those who are born
to married parents will see their parents reject each other before
they reach age 18.
Nothing in American history
rivals this assault on children and families. Despite the nation's
strengths, America is becoming one of the weakest of nations
socially, when it comes to considerations of the family. Somehow,
Americans expect their children to thrive in the culture of
rejection which imbues its social, political, and legal
institutions. In the family, in law, in education, in the media, in
the marketplace, and even in the church and synagogue-where
marriages most often start and have always been most treasured-the
vows a man and woman make to each other, to God, and to their
community mean less and less.
If the state turns against the married
family as its most basic institution, it is also rejecting the
"truths that are self evident" upon which our nation was built. We
have come perilously close to a crisis: A powerful section of our
political and social elite no longer see a great place for marriage
and worship in our society. Our government wants to step in and act
as parent, despite having no institutional capacity to evoke love
and loyalty and commitment from children and adults. Such is the
competence of the family, the church, and the school. It is with
these three institutions that rebuilding a strong society must
begin.
Thankfully, more teenagers now seem to have
heard the message. They are beginning to lead the way in reversing
the social unraveling that has occurred over the past three
decades. Are we adults ready to follow our children? There has been
talk of a "Fourth Awakening" in America, a possible continuation of
Protestant America's history of major religious revivals. If it, or
a variant, does not come soon, the strong peaceful America we have
known may soon exist only in our memories and the stories we pass
down.
Patrick F.
Fagan is William G. FitzGerald Fellow in
Family and Cultural Issues at The Heritage Foundation.
1
Patrick F. Fagan, "Rising Illegitimacy: America's Social
Catastrophe," Heritage Foundation F.Y.I. # 19/94, June 1994.